Letting It Go and Making Room- Clearing the Clutter From Our Homes to Our Relationships

So I have felt very impressed lately to let go of things!! I feel that I have been spending to much of my time trying to maintain an over abundance of stuff.  When I say "stuff" I mean actual things as well as relationships, expectations, and emotions.

Let's start with the physical tangible items. I am ready to purge of my life of all the extra belongings we have. We are a family of 3 but I feel that I have enough stuff for 40 people. It takes entirely to long to clean and pick up and maintain the amount of stuff we have accumulated. The problem is we have had family pawn things off on us, and we love to shop, and we are horribly sentimental. This stops here! I have been mercilessly going through clothes and ridding myself of things that have sat unused or don't fit anymore. It seems silly to hold onto the clothes i used to fit into and leave no space for the clothes I wear now. Why are we like that? Ever the dreamer, I coming to the realization that holding onto the past (skinny jeans), and living in the future (I'll need this for the next kid, right?), is robbing us of the joy of living in the right now (look all of clothes fit in the closet and dresser and I can actually find what I am looking for! Hooray!!) So for now we are going through the house and trying to make honest decisions as we get rid of, gift, or donate the things that we don't have time or space to enjoy anymore. I know that I can never let go of enough things to become a minimalist, but the lifestyle sounds appealing.

The next thing getting cleaned out are relationships. This can be hard. As tightly as I hold onto those old skinny jeans, I can hold onto a relationship that has served it's purpose. Are you pouring too much time into a relationship that is not leaving you feeling positive about yourself or the situation? We all do it. I am not condoning telling anyone off, or dumping everyone that requires effort, or even close to it. I am saying that there are people in our lives who have a season, and while loyalty is an admirable trait, it should not keep us tethered to those that have moved on.  There are people that come and go in your life, and you will come and go in the life of others. This is okay. This is  healthy Spend more time on the good and positive relationships in your life, put in effort there and make them better let them flourish and enjoy it. Stop putting your effort and time into relationships that will never go anywhere.


Next is letting go of expectations. I feel that so much of the pain and disappointment in our lives comes directly from our expectations of other people. We expect them to care as much as we do, or behave a certain way, or understand something the way we do. The list goes on and on. If we constantly carry these expectations into the relationship we are bound to be hurt or disappointed at some point. I have found that we have to realize that we are all human and all fail and come short. I have to let others be who they are without letting it change who I am .

On the other side of the coin, and for me the more difficult side, is letting go of expectations you have for yourself. It is great to be goal oriented, but sometimes we take it a little too far and we become a little to rigid. I have this problem. I like to have things mapped out, planned, written in a list and checked off one at a time. Life is not like this. Keep some of your goals, but learn that not everything can be planned and you may not be everything that you want to be, but that does not mean that you are not enough! I am horrible about time tables, I want everything when I want it. I have little to no patience naturally, and Heavenly Father often tries to teach me patience. So I need to let go of some of my expectations of what my life should look like, what I should look like now, or how far I should be on my plan. I need to work on what I can change now and learn to let other things go. I am my own worst critic, but I am also the one creating the unreachable standards sometimes.



Finally I have to let go of emotions. I have to let go of the actual feeling of, disappointment, or shame, or even anger that the clutter in these aspects of my life have caused. I have to be willing to let go of the stress that has been my constant companion for so long now. I have to be willing to clean out those negative feelings in an effort to make more room on the shelf for happiness, joy, and love.



I hope that this post makes sense. It helps me to write it and get it out. Maybe it will help you too, or maybe you have already learned these life lessons and are working on something different. Either way thanks for visiting this corner of my mind with me.